I can't say I LOVE hurt. But what I can tell you about it is ... It's definitely a learning experience.
I recently experienced a hurt that I haven't felt before ... The hurt of a broken heart. I learned so much from the experience. Again, I wouldn't say I've enjoyed the process or wish it on anyone, but I have to say in the moment when I needed to speak confidently I was able to. God has given me that CONFIDENCE to be who I am & not be afraid to stand up for myself.
I've also learned that I don't need a guy to tell me I'm beautiful or special because God made me perfect and I am beautiful and special to him! I also know that it doesn't mean anything if a guy tells me I'm not worth it because if I wasn't worth it then I wouldn't be here.
By the grace of God he is mending my broken heart. It takes time, ALOT of time, but it's a work in progress. And one day I will be happy ... so happy I won't even know what to do with myself, and until that happens I'm just going to keep perservering through the hard days knowing that God will be right beside me the whole way through.
What an amazing thought,
"'Never will I leave you, Never will I forsake you'. So we say with CONFIDENCE, 'The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid. What can mortals do to me?'" (Hebrews 13:5b-6).
This gives me such HOPE ... We may get broken hearts or get hurt or be in pain, but in the end the Lord will never leave us, He is our helper and at the end of the day no man can burden us because the Lord takes that burden from us. I have so much to be thankful for!
I think I have been somewhat wallowing in my pain ... NO MORE! I don't want this hurt to be a negative in my life, I want to learn as much from it as I can and if I think about it in a more positive way I will be able to get over it more quickly & not be bitter.
Today's "I love" ... well its not something ... it's someone ... some four!!!
I lived with Dave & Michelle for almost a year in Edmonton while I was taking my esthetics course. I didn't know them before I moved in ... but now 2 years later ... They are my second family! Carter & Everett are 'my boys'!! They are my 'nephews I don't yet have'!!
I cannot tell you how grateful and happy and blessed I am to know such amazing people. When I go up to visit them or see them when they are here in Calgary it's like no time has passed and we pick up right where we left off, even if its been months since I've seen them.
I get to see them this weekend and these are friends who make me SOOO incredibly HAPPY!!! Just thinking about going to see them .. AHHH I'm just so excited!!
God really has blessed me with the Childs Family ... You guys are so special to me & hold a very special place in my heart!!!
I LOVE that feeling of being able to laugh so hard I start crying! That happened tonight ... Jesse, my little brother, is leaving for school for 3 months in Texas tomorrow morning so tonight was our last hangout night ... He was asking me how to sneeze without making noise! Let's just say when he tried to sneeze without making noise it failed!!! We started laughing and NOT a word of a lie ... NO exaggerating here ... We laughed SO hard I had tears rolling down my face!
It's times like those that i realize how happy I really am, how privileged I am that I have friends and family who can make me laugh and who love me so much! I am so thankful that God has placed such amazing people in my life & I pray for each and everyone of them everyday!
Starry nights remind me,especially, of one of the years we went to Molokai, Hawaii. It was Sarah, Candaci, Matt, James & me ... we were sitting out on the porch and watching the stars. Someone had the brilliant idea ... no one could talk until they saw a shooting star! Well ... we ended up talking the whole time because there were so many shooting stars!! That is one of my favorite memories about those Molokai Mission Trips!
I LOVE being able to look up into the sky and see millions and millions of stars ... It's absolutely astonishing that there is a Creator who numbered each and every star and put them in a specific place!
i LOVE wearing skirts & dresses!!! they remind me that it is summer and no longer winter ... which is a huge plus when you live in Calgary!! so while it is still summer ... i will be wearing skirts and dresses for as long as possible!!
So I have decided that I am beginning to become alot more negative & I am surrounded by to much negativity at work .... I don't really like the person that it's making me ...
This is how I am going to try and make a difference in my life ... once a day I will post something on my blog that I love or something that makes me happy! I find that when I write I get alot of my feelings and thoughts out ... So maybe if I write down some of things that make me smile or make me happy I can have a more positive outlook on life. It's a very psychological problem!!!
It's also going to help with the once a month posts from me on my blog!!
Here's to being happy!!!
One of my favorite things is ...Freshly Painted Toes/Nails!!
It's probably because this is what I do for a living, but the look of freshly painted toes/nails is so refreshing & I love the look of it!!! Ahhhh ... so pretty!!! Yes, you may laugh if you'd like!!! I would too!!
That's about it :) just an FYI for those of you who forgot today was the beginning of a new month!!
Here are a few things that happen in April:
•it's national poetry writing month
•Easter (24)- which includes Good Friday (22)
•in south Africa they celebrate "freedom day" on April 27
•Carnation Revolution - Portugal - on April 25
•April fools day, of course, the 1st
Just a few things I didn't know happened in April (other than Easter and April fools).
The birthstone is a diamond and the flower is a daisy (or sweet pea) ...
What are the odds that daisies & diamonds are 2 of my favorite things and I was born in April!!! Perfect fit!
groundhog day ... I always think of the movie groundhog day and I get so frustrated with that movie ... it's like living in a nightmare ... living the same day over and over again ... ugh I would not do well with that!! anyways that time of year has come oh so quickly ... and did our "balzac billy" the gopher see his shadow today?!
that he did :( 6 more weeks of winter Calgary :( bundle up and stay warm!!
on the plus side ... 17 days till Sarah & Matt's Wedding!!!! AHHHHHHH can't hardly wait for those two love birds to be married already!! hehe love yous!! xoxo
so as soon as sunday hits, every week, i get super depressed. i work 9-5 every sunday, which means i miss church, i miss seeing my friends, i miss worshiping with my church famiily ... most difficult thing i have to do all week. BUT i've been doing this devotional since christmas and its talking alot about joy and being in THIS moment. its been so good for me ... and today as i sit here getting ready to work i'm finding it really hard today. so i'm going in today with this as my prayer:
I can find JOY in every circumstance
I will reJOYce in THIS moment
I find rest where there is JOY
GOD is my JOY!!
I had THE most splendid coffee today ... it sure wasn't the coffee that made it so spectacular ... it was my dearest friend Mariel! I think I sometimes take for granted the amazing people I have in my life, until they go away and I don't see them for a while ... and I realize how amazing they are and how much I love them. And sometimes friends don't even have to 'go away' ... maybe I won't see them for a few days ... and when I hang out with them I realize how lucky and honored I am to have such wonderful friends!
I spent New Years Eve with my family (Matt included :)) and Sara and Jordan ... It was the perfect way to ring in the New Year ... trying to eat 12 grapes in 1 minute, sitting at the edges of the table eating, and watching a movie that, of course, I feel asleep in! ... but really ... if I was to describe to you a splendid evening with family and close friends ... last night would have been it!!
So thank you to all of you who make my life so amazing and who have invested in my life and made me the person I am today.
I wish each of you a year full of happiness and many blessings.